Bezi - Week 7 - "Latvia!"

June 29, 2015

All is well..... 

This week was absolutely insane. So Sister Twede was supposed to be serving with us because her companion didn't get her visa, but apparently there was a mix up. President Schwab wrote the MTC about the trainee not getting her visa, and a couple hours later President gets a call from the MTC and says, "We have a problem..... that sister that apparently did not get her visa, just landed in the Samara Airport 20 minutes ago." That poor girl landed in Samara with no greeting party. I can't imagine how scary that would be, especially because she was all alone! But some people noticed that she was a bit distressed and let her use their phone and she was able to get a hold of the Schwabs and the Schwabs let her know that they were coming to get her. So, Sister Twede is not in a trio with us, however that would have made for quite an interesting companionship seeing that we are all the oldest sisters in the mission. By the way, my star of a companion, Sister Sotnikova is sister training leader. She has been beaming the last few days, it has been so fun to see how happy the responsibility makes her. 

Next cycle 6 new sisters are coming in. And By October half of the mission will be filled with missionaries who have been out 2 months or less. That is crazy. As of right now there are 51 missionaries here and pretty much all the senior couples are going home in the next 2-3 months, so sad :( They might have to call some office missionaries. 

Tuesday and Wednesday are always contacting days here in this area. They can sometimes be verrrry long, but I have gotten used to contacting 7 hours a day :) Uuuuuhhhhhhhhh tell me about the heat. It's like 105 degrees here I swear. I am costantly soaking wet. Thank GOODNESS we have been contacting in the mornings. I would die if we weren't allowed to do that. We have A/C in our apartment, one of the only apartments that does have A/C and it is a HUGE blessing. Seriously I remember last summer how hard it was to fall asleep because you were so hot,  and yes we had fans blowing on us all night. It probably doesn't help to fight to heat that I drink burning hot tea and eat hot Russian borsch every day... By the way, here in Russian the sun starts coming up at like 2:30, it's really interesting. The sun is already up by 4:00.

On the way to the airport I was with a couple missionaries I had never met and some who are really new. Man, I love love looove the missionaries in this mission. They are all such champions, I feel like on a mission its such a privilege to be around other missionaries because we are all trying to be as Christlike as possible out here. I couldn't help but laugh at some of the topics that came up... talking about Marshootka drag races (Marshootkas are these EXTREMELY old and broken down buses that are just filthy and usually in really poor condition). And also, talking about "Bab squads". More than often, sitting right outside of every apartment is a group of about 4-6 babushkee. They just sit outside on these benches all day long and chat with each other, and every time you try to get into the apartment building they ask who you are, why you are trying to get in the building, and who you are going to. They either end up being your best friends or they hate you :) 

Sister Sotnikova and Sister Wilson

On Thursday we had a visa trip to Lativa, I was supposed to be on a flight with Elder Graf to Moscow and then to Kiev, but the APs called me and told me that that was a mistake... and that I'd be leaving 4 hours later than everyone else on a flight to Moscow and then to Lativa. I was a bit bummed actually when they told me that because I'd been working myself up to see him. But, God awards us according to our desires and provided a way ;) When we landed in Moscow, turns out that Elder Graf's group going home to America had a really long layover and we ended up running into them. However he had gone to get some food with another elder and some of the other missionaries going home stayed to watch over their belongings. Our group going to Lativa had a 2 hour layover ourselves, so we just plopped ourselves down with them and decided to wait and surprise him. A few minutes later he came walking up with his companion and a big smile on his face. Oh man it was SO WEIRD seeing him in the beginning, it was like, are you a real person standing right in front of me? I haven't seen him in 2 years!! He's been such a good missionary, so hard working and all missionaries love him so much, especially the mission president. It's impossible to cover 2 years in twenty minutes, but we were able to do some good catching up. He's still one of my closest friends and it was such a blessing to be able to see him on his way home. So interesting to know that the next time I will be in that airport, I too will be going home. 

 

Elder Graf and Sister Wilson ...
high school friends serving in the same mission

Our area is really struggling right now... and our investigators really just aren't progressing much or taking things as seriously as we'd like them too. I am praying that we'll find some new investigators this week. 

I am so so grateful for my mission. There's nothing I'd trade this experience for. I'm grateful for opposition, I am grateful for the good and the bad days here. I am grateful for bitter and for sweet, because the contrast with it all just makes everything so much richer. 

Be good :) 

Love, Sister Wilson 

Bezi - Week 6 - "Transfers"

June 22, 2015

Bezi branch meeting house
tucked behind all those beautiful trees

All is well :) 

We got transfers this weekend and it was one of the first times on my entire mission that I wasn't extremely nervous to know where I would be going. I had a feeling that I would probably be here with Sister Sotnikova another cycle, and we were right :) However.... there is a catch. I am going to be in a trio. Sister Twede is supposed to be training this cycle, but her trainee didn't get her visa, so Sister Twede will be with us until her trainee comes. I've never been in a trio, and honestly I kind of felt like Joseph Smith when he found out that he needed to practice pologamy. It seems like it would be so hard to share your love with another person! However my companion has been in a trio a couple times, and she says that its like having children... you love all of them sooo much, just in different ways because they are all different :) Sister Twede and I knew each other before the mission and she is SUPER humble and creative and I'm not afraid of her at all, it's the word trio that scares me. I am sure she probably felt the same when she heard she'd be in a trio! But the next morning when I woke up I just felt peace and I have a feeling that I'm going to learn a lot about compromising opinions (between 3 people now) and that this cycle is actually going to be a blast. I'm so excited to be learning from another missionary! 

Sister Sotnikova really helped me with my accent this week. It seems to me that an accent isn't about learning how to speak like a Russian, but learning how to speak every single word correctly. We were reading together and she'd pick out about 5 words that I needed to work on. It's so weird because a lot of the time I can't even hear the difference when she tells me the correct and incorrect way to say a word.  

Of course we're praying for miracles. And we've gotten a lot more specific in the miracles that we are seeking. Last week the morning started out real tough. I had the biggest black cloud over my head. I felt that I couldn't do the work because I knew that the Spirit wasn't with me. So I asked that we sit down a moment and I prayed until I felt the Spirit return to me, and the Spirit returned to me when I remembered that we need to always look to Christ. But anyway Heavenly Father is so wise, he totally knew that Sister Wilson was going to take a minute and sit on a bench and pray and he planned a miracle into our day. About 30 minutes later we ran into a member who was on his way somewhere. We stopped him and talked a minute, and then before departing my brilliant companion asked for a referral. This member gave us TWENTY referrals. He went through his phone with us and picked out people that he thought were good candidates, these people are spiritual and he has talked to them about us. What's cool is that one of those people came to english and showed great interest in the Book of Mormon and has now become an investigator. 

Another miracle, I called Sister Martinez this week to ask for some numbers of new converts to call in their area and she told me that N, one of the people that we stopped on the street last cycle, was baptized. Which is super interesting. I vividly remember that day. I had thee worst mood ever, and we were hurrying to a lot of lessons and I remember that we only contacted like 5 people that day. Well, N is one of them. And now she's a member :) so that's cool. 

Our area isn't doing so hot right now. We had about 4 member present lessons this week. My friend told me that in Mexico last week they got 13 new investigators in one week. That would be a HUGE miracle if that happened here during the period of a 6 week cycle. We've been doing a whole lot of contacting, my feet are always killing me by the end of the day, but it's a good kind of pain :) 

The other night while I was praying I realized that my urgency to obedience could still be stronger. I also came to the realization that, you know what? Obedience is not something that only applies to a mission. I will not only have to be obedience to rules that I don't understand on a mission, but I will have to submit myself to commands or promptings from God later down the road. When my child wants to go out with friends and the Spirit compels me to say no, I must say no. I must be obedient. I am praying for that desire and urgency to not slacken or loosen up on obedience. Sometimes it just seems like things would be easier by trying to get around the rules. But that is the way that Satan works. He is the father of all lies. He is the great deciever. He has no power to fulfil his promises the way that God can. 

With Love,

Sister Wilson 

Bezi - Week 5 - "Thanks to the atonement!"

June 15, 2015

home sweet home

All is well :) 

I have been fighting homesickness a little bit in the last bit of time with summer coming around and knowing that all my friends are at home going to lake powell together and what not... but I will never be able to fully give Heavenly Father another summer in my entire life. It's only a small sacrifice when you look at eternity :) 

My companion is doing well :) Oh how I love and look up to Sister Sotnikova. She has NO fear. She also has incredible patience and humility, two attributes that I have been especially praying for lately. We are learning so much from each other every day and it's been a HUGE blessing to serve with her. 

Many of the time we call our investigators to meet and they don't answer the phone or they even busy us and it sometimes just seems that we are bothering them. So this week we prayed that Heavenly Father would help our investigators to call us themselves to meet. We prayed for this throughout the week, and you know what happened? Our investigators called us throughout the week :) not just one. Not just two. But many of them! This week we just begged and prayed for miracles and went out and worked and it seemed like we didn't see much success, but I know that our obedience and works in that moment allowed for Heavenly Father to pour out a bucket of blessing in one day :) I feel like God sometimes holds those blessings and sees if we will keep pushing forward, and when he sees that we will keep going... seeing miracles or not seeing miracles, he is so much more ready to bless us because he knows in that moment we are working simply because we love God. 

Guess what happened this week? L popped up out of no where. We have seen her 3 times this week, 2 times at different activities and once on a lesson. I pray for her still every day but I am terrified that she is going to disapear and break my heart again haha. She's a bit of a mystery... doesn't talk to us for 3 weeks and then pops out of no where and acts like everything is okay when we ask what happened. I think she's got some underground concerns that we need to dig up. Oh goodness... the roller coaster rides that us missionaries go through :) we were hoping that she'd come to church this Sunday... but it turns out that she promised one of the members that she'd go with him to some trampoline place. Ugh... sometimes I just want to shake some of these members by the shoulders. 

My companion and I have Borsch every single day :) it's so good.
Also she eats a brownie for every single meal

At the end of every single day, no matter how hard it is or what I did or did not accomplish... I can go to sleep with a smile on my face thanks to the Atonement of Christ. If there's anything I have learned on my mission, it is repentance and that we truly can FEEL cleansed thanks to the power of the Atonement. I am grateful to be walking dusty roads and feel what its like to be rejected and rejected hour after hour, because my gratitude for the Atonement grows, knowing that Christ has not only felt what I am feeling, but he has felt the pain and rejection that every missionary feels. I love my mission so much. I have no idea who I would be right now or what I would become without the rock solid foundation that my mission is helping me to build. I am honestly just pouring my heart out in prayer. Prayer has become so important in my life. It is like my lifeline. Anytime that I feel down trodden I can talk to somebody. I feel like maybe my faith has faltered in the last little bit and you know what? Everytime it is because I have taken my eyes off of Christ. Everytime I focus on Christ and remember all his promises I feel more peace. 

Love, Sister Wilson

Bezi - Week 4 - "Pull up your socks"

June 9, 2015

All is well :) of course.

Once again I don't even know where to start... first of all some people asked if we're allowed to wewar sunglasses or not because I was wearing some in my last email. Well, I read the white handbook and I don't see anywhere that it says we can't wear sunglasses. My guess is that Heavenly Father would want me to protect my eyes even on my mission :) But just in case I called Sister Schwab and asked if it was allowed and she told me I could, so there we have it :)

This week we did a lot of contacting again. We've been getting up early in the mornings and just hitting the streets for 2 hours. Samara is such a good place and the people on the streets are much sweeter but I do admit that I miss Saratov a little bit at times! I was there for a whole year and my heart is still wanting to go back somedays. Those members are my best friends. But I am working really hard on building relationships with people here as well. It's so awesome praying for people and trying to love people and really seeing a noticeable difference in a person when you are sincerely striving to build friendships instead of members thinking that we are just people who need their help for a month or two and then the relationship is cut off as soon as we leave. I really want to somehow have an impact on these people and their lives while I am still here. 

L, the girl that I met the first week that I was in this area, has fallen off the face of the earth (she even had a baptism date and had heard the first three lessons!) And since then we have met a lot of wonderful people and so so many people who seem like they are so ready for the gospel... but they end up being a one time thing or they end up being totally not interested. Yesterday I was especially upset by this when we called a girl that we'd met yesterday who had told us that she has wanted a Book of Mormon for so long and was so excited when we gave her one, and then today we called her and she had blocked our number. Then we called another man we'd met on the street who was just begging us to help him to stop smoking and he had given us the wrong number. That pretty much brought me to my ends wits.... 

I have never prayed more fervently in my life for Heavenly Father to please please pleeease bless us with miracles and with people to share this amazing message with. As a mission we have a goal to baptism one person every cycle... yesterday I just felt my hope starting to run dry when I realized that we only have 2 weeks left in the cycle. I went into the bathroom and got on my knees and just prayed and told Heavenly Father exactly what I was feeling and honestly I was just having a "Oh God where art thou?" moment. 

Actually after my prayer I just picked up the phone and called the APs. I explained that usually I call President about most of my problems but I really wanted to talk to some of my comrades who know what its like to hit the streets hour after hour after hour. I didn't expect to get emotional at all but I totally started crying. It just breaks your heart to invest your entire soul into helping these people and praying your heart out for these things and seeing nothing. I really was having a heart break moment. I was so grateful for them though, they really gave me all the words that I needed to hear and honestly all that I needed to hear was a little, "wipe away your tears, pull up your socks, and keep going." They were actually a lot nicer than that, but pretty much they said to keep pushing forward and rely on God and don't lose hope. 

I really don't understand God's plans. I have no idea whether or not we will get a baptism this cycle. But God knows all things and I will keep praying for a baptism and for these people until the end of this cycle :) 

Love, Sister Wilson 

Faith also includes trust in God’s timing, for He has said,

 “All things must come to pass in their time.” (D&C 64:32.)

We are to work steadily, but realistically, 

and only expect to reap "in due season." (Gal. 6:9)

A reassuring promise is given us in this journey:

 “And any man that shall go and preach this gospel of the kingdom, 

and fail not to continue faithful in all things, shall not be weary in mind, neither darkened.” (D&C 84:80.)

Neil A. Maxwell - “LEST YE BE WEARIED AND FAINT IN YOUR MINDS”

Bezi - Week 3 - "Not getting cooler anytime soon"

June 1, 2015

All is well :) 

This week we did a lot of contacting. We noticed that a lot of our investigators really aren't progressing, when people won't keep commitments time after time after time... maybe they need a little bit of time. We did splits with the sisters from Penza and the whole time it was just contacting. I have really come to love the way that each sister works individually out here, I love how much I can learn from each missionary. I have actually starting tracking qualities that I love in others and writing them down, one of the qualities that I have really fallen in love with out here is humility. Which maybe I love that quality because it is something that I am lacking a little bit :) 

We are praying for miracles every day and praying more fervently. I think we really could still pray more earnestly. I am just grateful for Heavenly Father softening people's hearts every day. If I can get a few good conversations in every day I feel really good. But something that my companion pointed out to me this week is that literally no effort is wasted. Literally. For example if we just talk to a woman on the bus with 2 young daughters and make really friendly conversation and help her to understand that we are normal people... well maybe 10 years down the road one of the daughters will be 16 and find the missionaries and desire to be baptized, and that mother will allow it because she knows that we are normal people because missionaries made friendly conversation with her 10 years ago. It really is nice to know that literally all acts now can bring miracles later down the road. 

The branch here has about 30 people who come reguarly. The branch president has been in office for about 20 years now, what a valiant man. There's quite a bit of drama in our branch and just some contention and I can't imagine how exhausting his job is. There are lots of grandmas and a lot of youth that are new converts, which a lot of those new converts went less active not long after baptism so we're working on leading them back to the fold by focusing on faith in Christ. 

I can honestly say that before my mission I had no idea what it meant to exercise faith in Christ. I feel like maybe now after repetition and studying and pondering I know what faith is, but actually exercising that faith is a constant battle. The other day I was thinking to myself about why my family has stayed in the church all these years. To me it just seemed like a habit coming to church and reading scriptures and praying because that's just how I was raised... but honestly what has kept me coming back and thirsting for more is the Spirit. I know that this church is true because of what I feel. Whenever I feel tempted to doubt, I try to recall what the Spirit has given me and recalling those feels gives me hope that I will feel them again :) 

Love,

Sister Wilson 

Alma 32:28 : “If ye give place, that a seed may be planted in your heart, behold, … ye will begin to say within yourselves—It must needs be that this is a good seed … for it beginneth to enlarge my soul; yea, it beginneth to enlighten my understanding, yea, it beginneth to be delicious to me.”

For more beautiful quotes on Faith click here

Bezi - Week 2 - "Summer is Here!"

May 25, 2015

All is well, actually everything is really really great :) 

We pray for miracles every day. And that is something that I will probably continue to pray for after my mission in order to help me to continue exercising faith in Christ. On a mission the miracle is that we find a new investigator, and maybe when I get home my miracle will be that I found my baby's long lost binky. 

Holy cow. I LOVE Sister Sotnikova. So much. I cannot say enough good about her. She has her weaknesses as we all do but she is such a hard worker and so humble and we are able to work so hard together, and it feels so good :)  I haven't laughed so much my entire mission. Honestly I kind of feel like a goofball sometimes and feel like I need to be more reverent or something but she is just so funny I can't even help it. She has a dry, witty humor and comes up with the most ridiculous senarios. I never knew that I would be able to laugh so much and connect so much with a 28 year old Russian woman. She is really my best friend. I have been praying to have more love for her, and maybe she's been praying for the same thing, because our companionship is super strong right now and we truly do love each other :) she is from Yekatinburg and when I showed her a picture of Tanner (who served his mission in Yekaterinburg) she said that she's seen him before, interesting right? She was baptized 6 years ago.

There is not a week that goes by that I don't have reflecting moments when I feel an enormous love and reverence toward my mission. I love my mission so much. 

I don't know who on earth would ever want to marry me without me being humbled by all the experiences I have had here. And I still have sooo much further to go. Proof of that is when we tried to return our vacuum today and the woman told us that it was broken and we can't return it.... I was so frustrated in that moment for not getting my way and I was so surprised at the angry feelings that I had, I haven't felt such feelings of frustration in a long time! Then I realized that I was being completely irrational and had no patience in that moment and that Heavenly Father doesn't get outraged when he doesn't get his way (when we break commandments or what not). So pretty much I had no right to be angry... interesting learning moments. Never even thought that I'd try to return a vacuum to a store in Russia anyway. I'd really like to see my mom trying to return it to be honest ;) 

Anyway all is well and I am happy and growing and LOVING the sun. It is apparently only like 80 degrees outside but it feels like 105. But honestly I don't care how hot it is... missionary work (for me) seem so much easier and more fun when its warm out and people are also a lot warmer :) Also I think that in Russia all mosquitos are born in one day or something. Because literally the night before there were no misquitos.. the next night I was eaten alive. LITERALLY 27 mosiquito bites in one night. Hallelujah that my mom provided me with $30 worth of top brand mosquito repellant. Last night it was really interesting to walk into a more forested area and watch as a herd of mosquitos tried to eat me but wouldn't touch my skin. It's like that mosquito spray makes my skin iron. I'm super grateful for it right now :) 

Our area is doing well! We've got investigators and we've been giving out lots of Books of Mormon :) 

Love, 

Sister Wilson 

Bezi - Week 1 - "Where do I even begin?"

May 18, 2015

Goodbye Saratov!

All is well :)

Holy cow. The amount of different emotions I have felt within the past week is insane. I seriously don't even know where to start. I guess I'll start from the beginning (that didn't sound cheesy at all) By the way this letter is SUPER long, so I won't be offended if you don't read it, but it is an interesting one ;) 

So. Monday, my companion and I went to Victory Park in Saratov. There is an insanely beautiful view if you go up on this big hill, and there I said goodbye to my lovely city :( man Saratov is such a good place. The members are my best friends, and the people on the streets are honestly some of the hardest, most stubborn people I've ever met, but I love them :) But really I can feel a huge difference with the people here in Samara. 

Victory Park - Saratov Russia

On Tuesday morning I finished packing all my stuff (it took me 5 hours to pack, such a pain in the behind) oh and by the way, one of my suitcases alone weighted 90 pounds, let's just say I'm glad I'm not going home anytime soon. At 4:00 there was pretty much a wolf pack of missionaries at the train station who would be heading up to Samara. My very first train ride in Russia :) :) :) We got to Samara at 2:00 in the morning. The mission's van driver came to pick us up and then would drop us off at our various locations throughout Samara. Guess where we'd be dropping by first? The zone leaders.  I never expected to see elder Graf at 2:30 in the morning in his pajamas, but that's exactly what happened :) he came out to help the elders bring there bags in and we said hi, shook hands, and parted ways just like we'd do if it were any other missionary. 

My new companion is Sister Sotnikova who is a native Russian. She is 2 cycles older than me and is a champion. I love contacting with her, she is very bold and isn't afraid of anybody. She is also very humble and motherly :) She is also very very very veeerrrryyyy superstitious. Probably the most superstitious Russian I have met. There have been a few times where I have stopped in the middle of our conversations and have to check to make sure that I am actually understanding correctly what she is telling me, then I'm always a little shocked when yes, I understood correctly. For example she thinks that people can turn into animals by the power of the devil (maybe that's true but I've never heard of that people) and she explained to me about how picking up money on the ground heaps other people's sins onto you because sometimes people throw money on the ground when they want to slough off sins or bad feelings. I'm sorry I really didn't have any charity in some of these situations and just told her, "No. I am sorry but that is absolutely not true." I am going to need to work on seeing from her point of view a little bit more this cycle....

The first two days of speaking straight Russian all day gave me a real big head ache, but now I am used to it :) I have been learning a lot of Russian slang the past week. I've always been against slang, but Sister Sotnikova told me that slang is the soul of any country. And... I agree. She says that if she hears a missionary talking and they use slang she automatically thinks that they are fluent in Russian. Because only people who REALLY live in a country know the slang and more informal parts of speak. Of course I won't speak slang with random people on the streets, but it will help me to connect to the youth and it will help with my understanding. So we'll see how it goes :) 

On Thursday I met a bunch of the members in the branch at English group, including K who is a new convert (Elder Graf and his companion were the ones who taught him before he was baptized). He is such a little punk :) he is a real jokester that's for sure. He walked us home from English group and just raved on and on about Elder Graf to me the whole way haha, he really really loves that guy. 

Yesterday at church I was feeling a little bit homesick for my ward in Solnechney, and then about halfway through sacrament meeting, through the window I noticed a girl run into the church building. It was my first Sunday here so I thought that it was probably somebody who was just running a little late. K ran out and got her because she was standing awkwardly in the hall and she came in and sat by him. I turned around to one of the missionaries who has been here longer and asked him, "do you know that girl?" he said no, and I then assumed that it was a friend of K's and it was her first time here. I kind of squirmed in my seat a little bit the whole time because the theme was temples and work for the dead... which can sound SO weird to people who have never heard of it before. 

At the end of sacrament meeting I ran to the back of the sacrament hall and grabbed her just as she was about to walk out the door. I asked her what her name was and if it was her first time. She said yes and I asked her to come sit down with me a minute. I asked if she was friends with the new convert and she said no. I was a little bit shocked and then asked her how she ended up here. She said, "my father is a taxi driver and he drove some of your boys not too long ago and they gave him this book." she then showed us her Book of Mormon and said that she just came to the address that was written on the inside. She said that her father also wanted to come but he was working that day. (I was honestly shocked, and it was so hard not to freak her out with my excitement of seeing such a miracle right before my eyes.) She said that she's been interested in our church for about 2 years now and once she got the Book of Mormon she had a little more direction on where to start with things. She stayed (happily and more than willingly) for all 3 hours, we managed to have a restoration lesson and committed her to be baptized when she receives confirmation. She said that she is totally ready to commit to this if she knows that it is true and understands that baptism is a big step. She promised to come to church next Sunday and we even set up another meeting for her this week :) I have literally never met anyone more elect on a first acquaintance to the church in my entire life. Her name is L and is a star :) I am pretty sure that I am in this city right now specifically for her. She loves swimming and rock climbing and sports and is SO cool. I love her. 

Love,

Sister Wilson 

Sister Wilson mentioned "Temples and Work for the Dead" 

These sacred ordinances are to allow people who have already passed on 

to accept the teachings of Jesus Christ. Follow this link to learn more